I'd Rather Shoot Myself or Marry a Wealthy Man

My brother and I had a discussion about things I wouldn't like to do and would rather shoot myself or marry a wealthy man. The list is as follows:

1) Work at McDonald's again.
2) Become a podiatrist.
3) Have my hair permed.
4) Work for my dad (in becoming a dental hygienist)
5) Live in Utah past being graduated from college.

This list could go on and on, and probably will but it has to end at some point and I choose now. 

The smell you just can't get away from because it's emanating from your head.

The barren wasteland of the soul.

Your work on crack.

My fire and brimstone.